Welcome to the Jungle

This saturday morning I will leave from the Handicrafts center in Bandar to Temburong where I will spend 6 days 5 nights in the jungle. Wish me luck, I will have to contend against tribes of cannibals, flesh eating disease, Mosquitoes the size of pens and other unseen dangers. Despite all this I remain confident I would survive this ordeal, even though my right wrist is injured. I'm the one-armed bandit bitches, nothing can bring me down.

As a toast for my future torture session I ordered pizza, a large super supreme. Which I finished by myself. A feat to be proud of. Tell your grandchildren. When I think about it pizza is the perfect representation of human civilization. It's in an orderly circle, divided into slices, greasy, unhealthy, impersonal, cold and lacks personality but goooooooooooooooood.

Stalking around in the jungle looking for food to last you the cold nights, you spot a monkey. It goes into a blind rage, followed by a testosterone induced charge towards you. You give it a hard headbutt to defend yourself, it staggers. You take this opportunity to grab it by the neck, and beat it's face to a bloody pulp. When the monkey goes limp, you grab it's neck and twist until you hear a satisfying crick. Eat it raw or cook it, your preference.

Now THAT'S food with a personal touch.

Un bandido armado

I sprained my wrist and elbow of my right arm yesterday while playing handball during PE. I collided with Adlan and we both fell. It wasn't really that bad until after I decided to continue playing. Biasalah stubborn kali ah aku ani. Besides I hate watching other people have fun while I'm not. So now I can't write or lift my arm without experiencing excruciating pain. No bones are broken fortunately. But my arm muscles are messed up. I had to go through the rest of the school day writing with my left hand, which is fortunately legible hahaha and basically doing everything with only my left arm. This could jeopardize my scholarship but I remain confident that it'll heal in a week. Don't get me wrong though, it sucks hard. I'm typing with my left arm, using the mouse in left handed mode, eating using the left hand, picking my nose with my left hand, washing my ass with my left hand, flipping people off with my left middle finger and etc.

I can't tie my shoes, open a wrapper, open lids, use a belt, put money back in my wallet, unplug stuff, wear my watch, open my pencil case and so on without help. I guess this made me appreciate my right arm more. I guess it's true when they say you don't know what you've got til' it's gone. It's a two armed world out there.

I broke my xbox 360 after getting really pissed off at it. Y'see I bought this new game, original, cost me a 100 bucks. Got home really excited to play it. Only to find out my 360 scratched it to hell. So what did ol' Azeef do? He kicked it to oblivion that's what. Serves that overpriced garbage can right. It wasnt the first time this happened. Now it's just another paperweight. Dead. Gone to electric heaven. I'll just go get a new one when I have the cash. A new AND functional one, that doesnt scratch my expensive games. Karma's such a bitch sometimes.

I'm not that sad by this loss really, in fact I'm a bit glad I broke the damn thing. I'm getting too old for video games anyway

See? I'm angry AND happy at the same time. I'm a friggin walking paradox.

Zeef shuffles

I was bored and stressed before an interview. So what do I do?

ishuffle:

Hey Lady Luck

I tossed a coin and,
heads was what I got,
I cleaned them out,
thank you lady luck,
you know you're all I've got.

Hey Lady luck,
You look lovely tonight,
I don't mean to give you a fright,
but how bout one last kiss,
to help me win this fight.

Hey Lady luck,
You've got time,space and matter,
wrapped around your pretty little finger,
So if I may,
Just one little favor,
make things go my way.

Hey Lady luck,
You might forget your manners,
You might refuse to stay,
And so the best I can do is pray.

Hey Lady luck,
tell me something I want to hear,
Say I have nothing to fear,
with this scholarship I hold so dear.

There's an angel on my table

At the request of Sarah, cause she knows I can't say no.

1. What disappoints you the most?
When people say," Yeah I'll do it." But don't.

2. Where will you go if someone sponsor you a tour ticket?
Mexico baby.

3. What's your favorite thing to do?
Listen to music, play video games, watch my favorite TV shows. And also angan-angan thinking about stuff.

4. Do you think money can buy happiness?
Things that make me happy are as follows : Food, video games, movies, music and more food. What do they all have in common? They all cost money. Therefore Money=happiness. Money is great, if you don't like it, give it to me.

5. If you can have one dream to come true, what would it be?
To soar high in the skies. While getting paid. (laid too maybe).

6. Do you believe you can survive without money?
Nope. Straight no.

7. What are you afraid to lose the most?
Myself, my sanity and most of all, my friends

8. If you win $1 million, what would you do?
Do the smart thing, invest to get more Dinero. Once my rich-ness is secure, help other people that I know personally as I don't trust charities.

9. If you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
When it comes to love, I have zero confidence so probably no. Call me a pussy if you want but it's not like you're any better.

10. List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you?
Sarah. A girl who knows how to take charge, which is pretty hot. Smart and has a good sense of humor.

11. What are the requirements that you wish from the other half?
Understanding and honest.

12. What type of person do you hate the most?
The two-faced. The thief. The backstabbing assassin.The manipulative Sith lord. People who say bad things about me behind my back. When you have a problem with me say it to my face, I'm tired of charades.

13. What is your ambition?

To wear an airline captain uniform and sporting a pair of sexy Ray-ban sunglasses.

14. If you can teleport once, where would you go?

Fort knox, sja pasal banyak gold sana.

15. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?

My happiness.My wellbeing. My health. Because in life it all comes down to one thing, yourself.

16. If you could undo doing one mistake in the past, what would it be?

My mistakes are what made me, me.

17. If you have a chance, which part of your character would you like to change?
I wish I was more organized.

18. What music have you been listening to recently?
Dream awake by The frames

19. What is your least favourite animal?
Elephants because they're just ugly.

20. What do you do to relax?
Play songs in my head =)

Instructions: Remove 1 question from above, and add in your personal question, make it a total of 20 questions, then tag 8 people in your list, list them out at the end of this post. Notify them in their chat box that he/she has been tagged

Zaty
Zatul
Mahirah
Izzah
Izzy
Ian
Syarifah
Pyotr